men could NOT do what we do.. ;)

So, I have been thinking a lot lately about the miracle of birth (and so amazed by my tiny son) and I wanted to write about it-about my pregnancy and labor before I forget everything, because it's just such a surreal thing! Babies are miracles! The women body is a crazy, amazing thing! Men could never do what we do! haha!

So, in April of 2010, I had stopped taking birth control, (was supposed to be just for a short time) because I was going on a Leave of Absence from school to go to Rexburg and Idaho Falls to wedding plan! And while I was home, I was going to be getting a refill on my birth control from my OWN lady dr. The first week of May I was feeling sick from a night of being out on the town with some girl friends. But for the whole week? Who has a hangover that long? Plus I was 2 weeks late on my period. Tho I didn't think much of it kuz my cycle gets off when either going on or off of BC. But Cameron was scared that we were pregnant, so he told me to go get a pregnancy test. I got back to the house and peed on the forbidden stick. It didn't change right away, but THEN..crap. The other line showed up faintly. I didn't know whether to be happy or cry. We got in the car and went to Wal Mart together to get a Clear Blue pregnancy test. It was almost instantly "PREGNANT" what a weird night it was. The first person I called (kuz I JUST had to tell someone) was Crystal, my best friend from school. The next day was also a weird one, I flew to Idaho Falls, best flight EVER! only about 40 mins long! I the weekend and part of the next week with my family, Cam's family and friends. I was really nervous to tell my mom and dad so, I told everyone else to keep it a secret. I slept A LOT that week, not realizing it was from being pregnant, I had thought it was just work and school catching up to me and I actually had the time to sleep more now!

When we told Cam's mom, she didn't believe us at first, then started crying kuz she was so happy! It made me tear up too. I waited to tell my mom on the phone, kuz I already knew the disappointed look I would get-not being married and all. We told the rest of Cam 's family and I told my sister and my brother. (I eventually called and told my mom, and her response was "Good thing you're getting married" and "I guess it's not the worst thing that could happen".. Thanks mom for making me want to cry).

Anyway, it ended up I was really happy and wanting to tell everyone, but scared to tell people too soon, kuz we figured I was only about 4 or 5 weeks pregnant. And I was worried we would get so excited and get everyone else so excited and I'd miss carry.

We went to the dr and saw the baby for the first time. It looked like a jelly bean. We were told I was about 9 weeks. We got pregnant within the week of me going off BC, how crazy is that?! I couldn't believe it kuz at one point in my life when I was actually wanting and trying, it didn't happen and I thought I couldn't get prego. But now I see that as a blessing (kuz I NEVER have to talk to or see my Ex again!)

We started looking at baby stuff right away and got real excited! I started getting sick, no appetite and not really puking, but really nauseous all the time. I was tired, worn down, and just felt like crap all over. Going back to school was hard and I was working still too. Growing a baby is a full time job on its own, with lots of overtime! I started showing really quick and somedays I felt like I grew noticeably over night! School was hard and I had to cut back hours at work.

Growing Growing Growing...

There are a lot of points I don't really remember, but I do remember feeling him move for the first time. It was a weird feeling, but it made me so happy! I remember the day we found out we were having a boy! I cried I was so happy. We wanted a boy so bad! Cam was ECSTATIC! :) Cam immediately starting turning our spare room into a broncos room...haha!

I remember starting to get uncomfy in all aspects. I had to pee constantly. I remember being hungry ALL the time. I could eat all day long haha..I loved feeling him move til he got so big that every movement was awfully painful! A foot or a butt in my ribs, his elbow running across my side. I would just push back. Everyone wanted to feel my stomach. 30 weeks being pregnant, 10 weeks felt like forever! I was counting down the weeks.

I have never been poked and prodded so many times in my life! Blood tests, shots, Glucose testing. So fun. Its amazing how a baby takes everything from you from the very beginning. I started sleeping less and less, for less time at a time. An hour of consistent sleep was amazing.

I had to quit working at Applebees because I started having early contractions. At 35 weeks and 5 days, I went into the hospital kuz I was in so much pain and having Braxton Hicks contractions really bad. FALSE labor I guess. They monitored me, gave me a pill to slow down the intensity, and thought I had an infection, so they put me on antibiotics. Then I was sent home. Come Monday, I find out no infection. Weird.

December 23rd-37 weeks and 4 days-I thought for sure I was going into Labor. Only dilated to a 1 and not in labor. So I was sent home yet AGAIN. Christmas Eve, Cam's family got into town later in the day. We went shopping for Christmas dinner stuff, which I was happy to be walking around tho I was uncomfy. We went to eat dinner at KFC/Long John Silver. We laughed a lot and had a good time. My contractions were getting more and more painful all night long. We played Scene It. Contractions getting even worse. Oh boy. Stayed up late (well for me, from the time I started working I starting going to be by 9 .. then kept getting earlier and earlier...) Went to bed about 11 pm. I took Tylenol PM to help me sleep. Cam took some Nyquil kuz he was sick. So we were both pretty knocked out. I got woken up by a VERY strong, VERY painful contraction at about 1 in the morning. Had some pink show when I went to the restroom..OH BOY! I was so nervous. I tried walking around the house, sitting differently, trying to not think about it. It just kept getting worse. And pain in my back really bad. I tried to go back to sleep but it didn't work. I called the hospital. They told me I could come in or try a warm bath. So I got in the bath. It didn't really help! So I woke Cam up and said LET'S GO! I had to breathe thru every contraction!

We got in the car and went. I couldn't even walk to the hospital door. The security guy went to get me a wheel chair and open the front door for us. We got into the room. At this point the contractions were UNBEARABLE. I dropped the F bomb..only out loud once tho haha...They asked a lot of questions blah blah. When they checked me I was dilated to a 3 1/2! VERY GOOD NEWS! I was having a baby today and not going home without him in my arms :) They asked if I wanted an epidural. Well DUH! bring on the drugs. I had to have an entire bag of fluid in me before they could do it. Let me tell you, after those DAMN contractions, a LONG ASS needle in my back was like nothing. The IV was worse. I flinched a tiny bit tho kuz I was having a contraction. But the epi went in good. Once it kicked in, I felt amazing. I even got a tiny nap in :D The dr and nurses kept coming in to check my dilation progress. It was going fast! Before I knew it, they were having me push. Pushing is hard. Hold your breath for 10 seconds, hold your legs, PUSH. I will admit, I did crap while pushing, I thought it would be embarrassing, but by that time, so many people had seen my Vag and everything else, that nothing could embarrass me lol. I pushed for just over an hour and then he was here! 11:53AM The last push was the worst, getting his shoulders out. I thought I was gonna pass out. I cried when they laid him on me. Cam cried. His mom cried (oh yeah. my mother in law was in the room :) Like I said EVERYONE saw me in all my glory) I could feel everything as he slid out, tho I am sure it was desensitized from the drugs. I only had to get 6 stitches total on 3 little tears. It was the most amazing, weird thing I have ever experienced. How did this 7 lb 4.5 oz adorable little boy come out of me? He recognized my voice right away and kept looking toward me. We already had a bond. Him and daddy bonded right away. It was the most adorable thing ever. I fell more in love with Cameron that day (tho I do every day, I just saw another side of him) He was a perfect dad from the start. I finally was able to get outta bed after Desmund was all cleaned up and checked. It was weird. My butt was still numb and other things felt weird (that one I won't go into detail with) ... We moved to our room. It was so painful getting up and down and using the bathroom. Feeding my baby was weird too. I can't really put everything into words. But I don't want to forget either. We were on the news and in the paper for having the first Christmas baby at St Als. I already put the video clip on here of us. We got a bunch of free stuff. We went home when he was just over 24 hours old. Had our Christmas the day after..

Desmund is amazing. It's a hard job being a mom..a parent. But so worth it and I love my little guy. Even tho I get frustrated. I barely remember the first nights tho. And now he is bottle feeding because he has to be on Soy Formula. Its kinda sad, but he is doing so much better on that than he was with my milk.

I can't believe he is 10 weeks old today! TIme is flying and he is constantly learning. He amazes me! He is always checking things out and now he is smiling a lot. He is starting to giggle too and I love it. He makes the funniest faces and he just cracks me up. He looks so much like his daddy and is starting to act like him too. Oh boy, the next few years are gonna be..fun, hard, amazing. He is already growing so fast.

He had his 2 month appt this last Tues. I felt so awful with him getting shots. I wanted to cry when he screamed. And he was grumpy all day :( But he weighs 11 lbs 11 oz, he's 23 1/4 inches long, and his head is 15 inches. He's in the 50th percentile for his weight, and the 75th for his length and head size haha.. He's got short stubby legs and a long torso. He is the cutest baby ALIVE! Its the truth, I can't help that I created perfection ;) haha!!!

I just went back to school last Monday and it has been so hard being away from him. I have less than 200 hours of school left, which is AWESOME! But then it's work that I'll have to go to and be away from him. I am excited to work again tho. Make money doing what I love to do. Can I make money being at home with Desmund? That's what I would really love haha! Tho I do get cabin fever! Anyway, That's my pregnancy and labor story. It is an amazing thing. And a man could NOT do it with such grace as women do. God knew what he was doing when he created all this, huh? :)